Difficult People

People can be difficult! Unfortunately, I’m pretty sure that I can be one of those people. Our daughter likes to say that people are the worst. I’m confident that I’m not that bad. If you are honest with yourself and consider your own life, you might be difficult at times too. Rick Warren in his book “Purpose Driven Life” refers to difficult people as those who are, EGR – extra grace required. I’d like to think that my own bouts of “difficultness” are driven by specific events, but these bouts seem to pop up more frequently when the stress in my life is high. My hope is that it is not the new normal and that I’m only difficult on occasion – check with my wife, she knows the truth. In my professional life, I have been known to force issues instead of letting them go; it’s a trait that I am not proud of. When I was in position of daily leadership, I found that I had a lot more grace to give than I do now. I now have multiple positions in widely different fields; each requiring different approaches to the people that I interact with. 

So, these are my “management confessions”. But honestly, there isn’t a day that goes by that none of us sin. We are all simply poor miserable sinners – that is the basic truth of the matter. Sin and grace go hand and hand. Someone offends you (sin) and you react; oftentimes negatively (more sin). People “talk it out”, make up and return to a congenial relationship (grace). If you think about the conflicts you’ve had or the times when you were less than pleasant, you probably lacked grace. If we were graceful in the beginning, we would not have been labeled “difficult” in the first place. Grace does not always beget grace, but it sure helps keep things running a little smoother. Think about the conflicts and difficult people in your life and ask yourself, have I given grace to this person or situation? Without question, grace giving is a two-way street, but someone needs to make the first move.

13 Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness. 14 For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace. Romans 6:13-14

We are all instruments for righteousness for God. Let that sink in for a minute. We are not sinners, we are not unrighteous and we are not unworthy. We were brought from death, because of sin, to life with God. We have eternal life with God through our Savior Jesus Christ. God knew us so well that he intervened on our behalf and sent His son to earth to live the perfect life, under the law, because we could not. During the Lenten Season we are preparing for the end of Jesus’ life on earth and the beginning of our His eternal life with God; who intends to use us as instruments for righteousness. We can’t help but sin but God solved that problem too.

Verse 14 is critical, “For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace.” We are all benefiting from God’s grace. It is not our adherence to the law or our gifts or our good works that gives us eternal life. We are all poor miserable sinners and there is no denying it. I’ve written before, there are no “degrees” of sin. God sees them all and forgives them all. He does this through His grace to us, His children, and our faith in Jesus as our savior. There is nothing difficult about that.